I found the following parable on the Seeker’s Guidance blog. And while I respect the knowledge Sheikh Nuh Ha Mim Keller has amassed over the years, I have to ask: why a woman?
Why contribute to the stereotyping that women are the spiritual downfall of men? That even when covered from head to toe, women are still capable of tempting men into evil.
Stories like these, while beneficial in driving home an important religious message, just gives fodder to those who will use it against us. Nevermind that it’s the male character’s desires for a quickie that drive the story — the punchline remains that he was tempted by the most manipulative and hated creature.
You could have used a goat.
Change the parable: a shepherd sees a prized goat that doesn’t belong to him and chases him down the valley, missing prayer while dreaming about how much money the goat will fetch. By the end of the story, the reader may not be able to view goats the same way ever again, but at least they won’t be reminded about evil, vice, temptation, sex and sin every time they look at a woman.
And not just any woman. But a “hideous old crone” — because it’s so very easy to also be ageist, prizing youthfulness and turning our beloved mothers and grandmothers into the archetype of evil.
Thanks.
The Woman: a parable
© Nuh Ha Mim Keller 2001
A man was walking through the marketplace one afternoon when, just as the muezzin began the call to prayer, his eye fell on a woman’s back. She was strangely attractive, though dressed in fulsome black, a veil over head and face, and she now turned to him as if somehow conscious of his over-lingering regard, and gave him a slight but meaningful nod before she rounded the corner into the lane of silk sellers. As if struck by a bolt from heaven, the man was at once drawn, his heart a prisoner of that look, forever. In vain he struggled with his heart, offering it one sound reason after another to go his way—wasn’t it time to pray?—but it was finished: there was nothing but to follow.
He hastened after her, turning into the market of silks, breathing from the exertion of catching up with the woman, who had unexpectedly outpaced him and even now lingered for an instant at the far end of the market, many shops ahead. She turned toward him, and he thought he could see a flash of a mischievous smile from beneath the black muslin of her veil, as she—was it his imagination?—beckoned to him again.
The poor man was beside himself. Who was she? The daughter of a wealthy family? What did she want? He quickened his steps and turned into the lane where she had disappeared. And so she led him, always beyond reach, always tantalizingly ahead, now through the weapons market, now the oil merchants’, now the leather sellers’; farther and farther from where they began. The feeling within him grew rather than decreased. Was she mad? On and on she led, to the very edge of town.
The sun declined and set, and there she was, before him as ever. Now they were come, of all places, to the City of Tombs. Had he been in his normal senses, he would have been afraid, but indeed, he now reflected, stranger places than this had seen a lovers’ tryst.
There were scarcely twenty cubits between them when he saw her look back, and, giving a little start, she skipped down the steps and through the great bronze door of what seemed to be a very old sepulcher. A soberer moment might have seen the man pause, but in his present state, there was no turning back, and he went down the steps and slid in after her.
Inside, as his eyes saw after a moment, there were two flights of steps that led down to a second door, from whence a light shone, and which he equally passed through. He found himself in a large room, somehow unsuspected by the outside world, lit with candles upon its walls. There sat the woman, opposite the door on a pallet of rich stuff in her full black dress, still veiled, reclining on a pillow against the far wall. To the right of the pallet, the man noticed a well set in the floor.
“Lock the door behind you,” she said in a low, husky voice that was almost a whisper, “and bring the key.”
He did as he was told.
She gestured carelessly at the well. “Throw it in.”
A ray of sense seemed to penetrate for a moment the clouds over his understanding, and a bystander, had there been one, might have detected the slightest of pauses.
“Go on,” she said laughingly, “You didn’t hesitate to miss the prayer as you followed me here, did you?”
He said nothing.
“The time for sunset prayer has almost finished as well,” she said with gentle mockery. “Why worry? Go on, throw it in. You want to please me, don’t you?”
He extended his hand over the mouth of the well, and watched as he let the key drop. An uncanny feeling rose from the pit of his stomach as moments passed but no sound came. He felt wonder, then horror, then comprehension.
“It is time to see me,” she said, and she lifted her veil to reveal not the face of a fresh young girl, but of a hideous old crone, all darkness and vice, not a particle of light anywhere in its eldritch lines.
“See me well,” she said. “My name is Dunya, This World. I am your beloved. You spent your time running after me, and now you have caught up with me. In your grave. Welcome, welcome.”
At this she laughed and laughed, until she shook herself into a small mound of fine dust, whose fitful shadows, as the candles went out, returned to the darkness one by one.
July 21, 2011 at 1:07 pm
What rubbish.
July 21, 2011 at 1:37 pm
The woman turned and gave him a “meaningful look”…this is the basic crux of the matter with men…THEY get to determine what a woman’s “look” means. She may have just been looking at him…why did there have to be meaning to the look and why is that meaning nearly always interpreted by men to mean…come to me? Until men (and I will say Muslim men here as the culture of harrassing women for any and all “looks” is widespread) understand that not all looks are meant as a suggestive sexy turn on meant just for them…then there is no self realization that men are meant to control themselves…always.
July 21, 2011 at 1:55 pm
ugh.
July 21, 2011 at 3:16 pm
Aw, what do you have against goats? 😉
But seriously, ugh. Even the story itself wouldn’t be *as* bad if it weren’t for the title – calling it “the woman” puts all the focus and blame on her. Why not call it “the man,” after the protagonist of the story? Or “the easily-seduced man” or “the temptations of the world” (at least emphasising what the woman is meant to REPRESENT, rather than emphasising the woman herself), or “the pursuit,” or a number of things.
Not to mention how judgemental this is about old women or ugly women – the punchline of the story is about EW, how GROSS she turned out to be.
July 21, 2011 at 5:33 pm
not only that, it’s pretty orientalist too
July 21, 2011 at 6:22 pm
That was actually super creepy. I couldn’t even get to the sexism part, I was so creeped out by the idea of being buried alive.
July 21, 2011 at 10:14 pm
Exactly! Plus, there’s nothing indicating that he deserved it in terms of how he conducted his life at large.
July 21, 2011 at 10:12 pm
Simplistic AND implicitly misogynist. It also perpetuates the notion that men have virtually no self control and think only with their you-know-whats. I know several men who would find this extremely problematic for that reason.
July 22, 2011 at 1:04 am
I don’t see it problem. It’s a warning that people with great deal of self control can also be swept away. Also there is a refusal to acknowledge the power of seduction as Ideal Muslimah stated here :
http://theidealmuslimah.blogspot.com/2011/07/feminist-and-i.html
July 22, 2011 at 1:25 am
Ideal Muslimah? Is that what she calls herself?
Good for her. The rest of us mere mortals haven’t gotten there yet, and we don’t spend time putting down Christianity and the faiths of others and then turning around and calling our own Muslim sisters patronizing.
July 22, 2011 at 8:52 am
You are confusing the issue. Yes, we acknowledge that any deal of self control can be swept away. BUT BY A WOMAN. That is the point. These stories are always how the oh so pious man is led astray by the conniving woman. The power of seduction exists for both males and females. The ‘weak male’ fallacy is overdone and quite pathetic. Men are only weak when it suits them i.e. to use it to silence the voice of women.
And also, what Nahida said.
July 22, 2011 at 1:14 pm
The ‘weak male’ fallacy is overdone and quite pathetic. Men are only weak when it suits them i.e. to use it to silence the voice of women.
This, exactly!
July 22, 2011 at 1:11 pm
Thanks for commenting ahmad! And thanks for the link, though, I’m having a little difficulty making the leap from the power of seduction to the definition of feminism as IM seems to be making in her post (which by the way, I agree that in whatever women find empowerment is a positive thing — whether that’s adhering to the veil or taking down prayer barriers. Though, I can’t agree that “b!tchiness” is an inherent trait of feminism. At least, I sincerely hope that I’m not viewed as one!)
I understand the warning and the intent of the parable. I wonder though, would people have a problem with it, if Dunya was represented by a man seducing a woman, or a child? Why not choose food, gold, shirk? Any manner of sin? Why did the characterisation have to be of a woman seducing a man?
I believe the answer is simply, and unfortunately, that more people would be able to buy into that sexist characterisation: “oh of course it’s a woman! Women tempt and are sexual beings! Men are incapable of holding back from their wiles.”
There are plenty of examples that could represent the delights of this earth without resorting to the sexualising of a (already covered) woman.
July 22, 2011 at 8:59 pm
“A man was walking through the marketplace one afternoon when, just as the muezzin began the call to prayer, his eye fell on a piece of delicious, delicious ham… He wasn’t really sure how he knew it was delicious, because he had not eaten it, but his uncontrollable, manly instincts could not be wrong when it beckoning toward him seductively…”
July 22, 2011 at 11:29 pm
@Nahida, pizza, chocolate, fresh bread, danishes, and dosas beckon to me ALL the TIME.
July 22, 2011 at 10:49 am
If a man is stupid enough to follow a woman by just seeing her back, and cannot tell her age before locking himself in a room with her, he is pretty much a goner. The moral of the story is that one must always look at the woman’s face – hence the niqab is banned.
July 22, 2011 at 1:12 pm
cheeky! 🙂
July 24, 2011 at 4:59 pm
lolllllllll
this.
July 22, 2011 at 10:59 am
I was thinking about this more, and this line: “all darkness and vice, not a particle of light anywhere in its eldritch lines”? I know that this isn’t explicitly or necessarily a comment on the woman’s race, but the idea that part of her ugliness is that she’s dark also really disturbs me.
July 22, 2011 at 1:14 pm
add it to the list: ageist, ableist, sexist, racist…
July 22, 2011 at 4:21 pm
“Who was she? The daughter of a wealthy family? What did she want?”
The daughter of a wealthy family. LOL.
July 22, 2011 at 6:06 pm
“all darkness and vice, not a particle of light anywhere in its eldritch lines”
Considering that in Islamic thought there is no such thing as something having no light, it is kinda ignorant to begin with. God is absolute light, nothing on this earth is absolute dark, not even the devil. Which is why in Islamic thought the devil is not considered the opposite of God.
Anyway, I just had to throw that out there because that sentence bothers the hell outta me…
I won’t even get into the underlying sexist message, then I would just start ranting incoherently… lol
July 22, 2011 at 11:40 pm
It’s partially the language, but that line reminded me of LOTR. Glowing bright and pure elves vs evil, dark and twisted orcs.
Dark as evil is nothing new, and oh, so very unfortunate.
And particularly, not only is the evil woman full of darkness, but she’s “alien” “other” “foreign.”
July 22, 2011 at 6:11 pm
Oh yea, and that link to the post by the Ideal Muslimah, was actually written about me – so enjoy… LOL!
July 24, 2011 at 6:34 am
So what do you all say about the Hadith that says
“I have not left behind me any fitnah more harmful to men than women.” that it’s weak because you don’t agree with it?
I think we alll need to open our eyes and think realistically rather than emotionally. That story isn’t attacking women, it’s criticizing men for chasing something so temporary, so flimsy. No need to get so offended.
July 24, 2011 at 11:43 am
Hi Macai — welcome to the blog!
I’ve never explained how I interpret, understand or use ahadeeth, so there’s no reason to assume that I’d judge one to be weak based upon personal preference. There’s a science behind it, and I leave that type of judgment to the scholars who know them best.
As an aside, I judge ahadeeth to be pertinent when compared to the Qur’an and my daily life. So while I don’t own a camel to tie up in my courtyard, I will lock my car. I don’t need to eat with only three fingers, when I can eat moderately with a fork, spoon or chopsticks. I don’t need to cover leftovers with a pan and stick when I have tupperwear. That’s how I use ahadeeth.
As for the hadith you reference (is it a hadith Qudsi?) — I may see it differently. I’d absolutely agree with it, but perhaps not for the same reasons as anyone else. It makes sense in the context that for generations, people have debated whether or not women can lead prayer, pray next to men, leave the house, recite the Qur’an, or any manner of perceived oppression. That certainly causes fitnah. It doesn’t have to be about men fighting over women or seduction. I’m not sure how you see it — perhaps you can explain how you interpret that hadith. It would also be good to know what the Arabic text says and how a range of scholars have interpreted it.
No one has said that this parable attacks women. It just sets up a status quo accepting that the source of temptation and sin would come from a woman. Like I said, another example could have been used.
July 24, 2011 at 11:52 am
So I contacted Sheikh Faraz Rabbani — a spiritual leader, mastermind, and (founder?) of Seeker’s Guidance telling him my concerns over finding this parable on the site without context, interpretation or commentary.
Masha’Allah, he is a really wonderful person, accessible, knowledgeable, and his family is ridiculously cute. We worked together a few years ago on a couple of knowledge retreats, and randomly met yesterday at the same restaurant.
This is what he had to say regarding this issue:
I’m still thinking carefully about the point you make, as our religion has no place for injustice of any kind–and stereotyping, etc, is from injustice. I didn’t see this meaning in the article. I will consult with a range of people, insha’Allah, and proceed accordingly. Jazakum Allah khayr for the nasiha. I’m honestly considering it carefully. Please *never* hesitate to point our concerns–especially as it is clear that you mean well, and your concern is sincere. May Allah facilitate all ways of good for you and us, in the best of ways.
While I would have liked more ownership of the post, I do understand that he may not be the person who keeps their blog updated (in fact, probably not). But the issue has been acknowledged and insha’Allah, will be kept in mind for the future. We’ll see — and I’m still hoping he’ll get back to me regarding what they’ll do with the post.
August 12, 2011 at 7:30 pm
I’m commenting 6 yrs too late but I dint read any misogynistic undertones in the story. He buries alive part tho gets me every time. If you’ve ever been to the Gulf countries you see men following niqabis all the time tryin to get their number/ give his. I remember a news story about some guy who tried to mack on his mom. Embarrassing! That would have made his story even better, guy is buried alive with his crazy aunt Zelda and has to listen to her talk about her cats for the rest of his afterlife.
August 12, 2011 at 9:12 pm
Lol! Oh aunt Zelda 🙂
September 13, 2011 at 2:57 am
This story is frightening to me, but not for the reasons the author seems to have had in mind. It frightened me because, if you change the ending and the point of view, it happened to me. Except I was fleeing in fear from someone who tried to follow me home. That experience adds another layer to why I see this story as problematic.
A different observer, who didn’t know what I was thinking, might have described my behavior in much the same terms as that of the woman in the story. I saw a man watching me at the tram stop and, “conscious of his over-lingering regard,” kept an eye on him to see if he would do anything suspicious. When he got onto the tram I was going to take, I turned and headed for the crosswalk. When I saw him get off the tram to follow me, I started running. I had “unexpectedly outpaced him,” when I stopped because my lungs hurt from running so hard. At this point I was “many shops ahead” in the city center, and I turned back to see if he were still following me. He was, so I started running again.
Alhamdulillah, I managed to lose him in the crowd, and found someone I knew and trusted who could accompany me until I got home safely. No prolonged chase, which is good, because who knows what unchaste motives might have been ascribed to me if the man had overtaken me and seen my flushed face!
That might read as a bit flippant, but honestly, thinking about this story is bringing back the absolute terror I felt when being pursued by a strange man in an unfamiliar city. In my experience, when a woman is running away from a man, she really, really doesn’t want him to follow her.
Yes, I’d like to see this as a parable involving a goat. Nobody needs to lie awake reliving terrifying events of the past if the personification of the dunya is a goat.
September 13, 2011 at 12:26 pm
Excellent, excellent point. Thanks for sharing your terrifying and personal experience.
I don’t think you’re being flippant at all. Alhamdulillah you got home safely, You’re absolutely right — this story completely justifies the “she asked for it” perspective. It’s disgusting.