It always had the same title, but characters and their experiences changed depending on my mood — and when I was older with more romantic notions of inspiration, everything depended on my Muse.
“The Night Stalker” held caverns of unexplored territory in my imagination. I built castles, long, winding corridors, and brilliantly shining universes within my mind. The story wasn’t particularly terrifying or dramatic as the name might suggest — but represented a person who literally chased the night.
And I did. The best time to write in my mind was during dark thunderstorms. I would grab my umbrella and wander the streets around my parents’ house for hours, retreating into my mind’s sanctuary. I created worlds with their own set of universal realities and rich characters that only existed in dreams and desires. Each one searching and yearning for discovery, self awareness, and adventure.
Retreating to these worlds was like coming home and having a warm cup of tea. And then, excited and inspired, I could make them live on a piece of paper.
Not writing is disquieting.
So when I became busy with the return to work and juggling life, I could no longer pour words onto paper. I couldn’t. There simply wasn’t the time. I still walked the streets at night, creating posts and plans and dreams. But the longer I wasn’t talking to you, the more awkward it was to even think about what I would say to explain my absence.
Because I know that you know, that I know I’m not currently writing. And it shocked me to see that a month (a month!!) has passed since I last updated. And I just wasn’t sure how I could start that conversation explaining my absence.
All I want to do is ignore the gap and just take you all out for a coffee and pick up where we left off. Can we do that?
Thank you for staying. I know you’re out there — I see the steady numbers. Thank you for checking back to see if I’ve updated. Thank you for your concerned emails and your comments. Thank you for being an important and wonderful part of my life.
And in so many ways! Because even though I haven’t been speaking to you through the blog, I’ve been able to connect with a few of you through the (un)official Pen Pal Project! We live in an amazing age where Eryn and Ivy can “write” a letter and send it through snail mail — and be rewarded with pictures, tweets, Instagram and Facebook tags of people holding their letters, Eryn’s finger-painting on fridges, and home-made thank you cards in return.
I’m overwhelmed. It’s been an amazing little project. Thank you for making it happen.
So all that to say, yes, I will be writing soon. It may not be with the same frequency as in previous months — we’ll have to take it week by week.
But I miss writing and there’s just so many fun things to talk about.
(new post coming soon!)