They speak with hands, fluid shoulders and in a language that I’m not used to hearing. Language that is emotive, tactile and descriptive — such that you can taste the words coming from their mouths — feeling their physical presence.
Which really makes for an interesting afternoon.
I had the utmost pleasure today to co-host A Feminist Tea Party with the amazing Caitlin Rueter and Suzanne Stroebe. Our weekend of tea, sweeties and conversation started last night when Eryn and I joined the installation for a discussion on what makes art feminist — which was absolutely inspiring and had me dreaming of second- and third-wave feminism and the power of objects to convey messages — be they intended, real or imagined.
It’s been encouraging, educational as well as a privilege to enter into this discursive space in order to meet new people, share ideas and learn from each other.
Using FEMEN’s recent Topless Jihad and the anti-FEMEN counter protest as a starting point, we talked about Muslim and other feminism(s), how intersecting groups could work together in positive ways, but also whether FEMEN’s “sextremist” protest is an effective vehicle.
Here are some of the thoughts the group shared. We didn’t solve the world’s problems or draw up secret plans to blast the Earth with equity. I mean, c’mon, we only had an hour. But if you feel inspired to add your own thoughts and ideas to these snippets, please feel free to join the conversation in the comments.
When I think about the Play of protests, with the attention-grabbing tactics of protest culture — like colourful costumes, drums, huge puppets — it makes me think protests can also be a platform for creative energies. That using the body can be part of a large political issue, but that the message also has the potential to get lost in a picture printed in a newspaper.
When you use your body as a form of protest, you have to be cognizant of all the consequences. You may just want one thing to be heard, you know, your message — but if you’re sending something else out there, if you’re willing to do anything that’s publicity-seeking, that it gets the attention of young men… You may want them to listen to your message, but is that really the way you would engage them in a meaningful way, in a graceful way?
My first real pet was a bird. He was a darling blue budgie named Mookie who was trained to jump on my head and ride around the house on my shoulder. He’d give me kisses on the cheek and eat the dry cheerios floating in my morning cereal bowl. Cute, right?
Solly was a cat I owned twenty years later. The Hubby found me a free Siamese Snowshoe — someone to keep me company while studying in Montreal. This gorgeously funny, fluffy, dog-like beast ended up keeping three amazing women entertained for years with his nightly circus acts of hilarity. It broke my heart to find him a new home when I could no longer take care of him.
Recently we’ve been debating getting Eryn a pet.
A cat is out of the question since we’re already packed into a small apartment. A bird would be fine, but I’m not prepared for the mess or for the fight to keep Ivy from eating dropped bird seed shells. Hamster — too smelly and I’m afraid it would get swallowed by a couch. Fish — again, no room for the tank.
Since I’ve said no to every option so far, Eryn decided to get a pet on her own.
Introducing Schnecke the snail:
To say that I’m a little obsessed is an understatement. I’m determined to make sure this little guy survives.
I mean, it’s a grove snail Eryn and her Oma found in a flower pot. They can live anywhere between 7-20 years. That’s a HUGE commitment. He’s been entrusted to me, and like any pet, I have to look out for him. I’m hoping Schnecke makes it past the next two weeks.
So I’ve made him a fantastic habitat with shelter, hiding spaces, a stick, some soil, a water source, and a plate of food. The first night I freaked out because he refused to move — but beamed so proudly when he immediately took my offering of a plum and some cucumber. The Hubby is a bit put off only because I’m making sure we keep the lights dim at night.
You know. So we don’t bother the snail.
And today I noticed that he “cleans” his shell a lot. So I’m thinking he’s calcium deficient and will pop over to the local pet store to find out what kind of natural sources we can use to supplement the snail’s diet.
I’m also thrilled that only after 48 hours, he’s settling nicely into his new home. Eryn enjoys giving Schnecke a morning shower — but so far, I’m the only one who gets excited when he does just about anything. Move. Eat. Poop. Yeah…
The exhibit, as imagined by two phenomenal artists Caitlin Rueter and Suzanne Stroebe, is a participatory, multi-faceted collaboration to engage and raise social consciousness in the set of a midcentury tea party.
Sounds like a blast, no?
This is the 15th installation and the first time the artists have ventured into Canada!
At each event, we invite a new group of guests and, with them, a new conversation. We hope to engage with each of our guests, asking them to experience the space we have created, to perform within it by playing our game, to learn from each other in an open, supportive space for dialogue and, finally, to witness our collaboration and join us to make it their own.
[The exhibit] draws on the iconographic heritage of contemporary representations of women—sex and service, the consumer and the consumed. The gallery is recast as a home, an open forum where essential and discomfiting issues can be discussed freely and with a sense of humor.
I’m incredibly excited to be a part of this project — and hope that if you’re in the area, you’ll join us for an informal conversation on Muslim Feminism!
On June 15 from 2-3:00pm I’ll be facilitating “Hijabs VS Boobs: Adventures in Muslim FEMENism” — an informal discussion highlighting the various ways Muslim women are portrayed as walking contradictions or stereotypes of oppression — and how debates over the hijab often overshadow the work being done to champion women’s rights by Muslim women and their allies. What do Muslim women want? Can someone practice Islam and also champion women’s rights? And how can feminist groups work together, be intersectional, and celebrate difference?
The exhibit is at the O’born Contemporary Art Gallery in Toronto (just a short jaunt from Ossington Station) from June 14 – June 16, 2013.
Pop in to add your voice to the conversation, have a cuppa, or just come to say “hi.” I’d love to see and hear from you!
The day my friend took off hijab was disappointing. While everyone was offering congratulations on the new look, I couldn’t help wonder if my friend was having a crisis of faith. And when I asked if everything was okay, I learned a secret truth that sent me reeling.
He never wore hijab in the first place.
It was naive assumptions that led me to stereotype my friend as the “type of Muslim” who sports a beard out of religiosity, modesty and a reflection of his spiritual commitment. But I can’t really be blamed for doing so, can I? He was president of the Muslim Students’ Association, led prayer, gave the occasional khutbah, took religious courses, and embraced being a recognizable Muslim.
And while his beard changed shape over the many years of our friendship – from a sleek Hollywood beard to a goatee and back again — it just seemed like a natural assumption that his beard was worn to follow the Sunnah. If he was outwardly “religious” in all other aspects of worship, shouldn’t his beard be a reflection of his inner hijab?
Nope. I was absolutely guilty of stereotyping a person based on their visuality.
It turns out he grew a beard “because.” Just because. Because he could. Because it was stylish, comfortable for his skin and something guys did. I imagine having a beard also helped my friend gain some kind of authenticity at the mosque and within the community — even though that probably wasn’t his intention in wearing one. And as he didn’t wear it out of religious motivation, shaving it off was no big deal.
In fact, after speaking to several colleagues with various opinions and styles of “beard,” it seems like any sort of facial hair, or lack thereof, can exist without much commentary from others.
Sure there are naseeha-concerned-advice-giving-types who correct people on prayer, police women’s clothing and comment on beard length – everything from “that beard makes you look like an extremist” to “it is haraam to keep a cleanly shaved face.” Some experience extreme social and family pressures regarding the hair growing powers of their beard follicles, or are shunned outright by communities for having baby smooth skin. And the stereotypical image of a bearded Muslim is often used to incorrectly represent extremism, terrorism, and overall make things very difficult. With grave seriousness, having a long beard is sometimes grounds for being insulted, harassed and viciously attacked.
But there is a huge discrepancy between the type of attention given to the “proper way to hijab” and the “proper way to beard” — especially when looking at the online narrative.
The kids are in bed, the Hubby is away on travel and I have a bowl full of popcorn and a bag of chocolate at my fingertips. Yes, you read that right — an entire BAG of chocolate. This can only mean one thing: it’s time for a Muslim roundup!
It’s a super badass muslimah version of the roundup this week. We’ve got real superheroes, rockin’ muslimahs, some motherhood badassery, and of course, hijab.
Enjoy!
Ilwad and Iman Elman, inside the Elman Peace Centre. Photo credit: Michelle Shephard, Toronto Star.
1) Real life superheroes live among us.
With hijab fatigues blazing, Canadians Ilwad and Iman Elwad are helping rebuild Mogadishu, Somalia by taking on gender violence and the militant group Al-Shabab. No small feat for these two amazing sisters!
According to the Toronto Star, about three years ago, Ilwad and her sister left Canada to join their mother in promoting women’s rights and to help run the Elman Peace Centre, a rape crisis shelter.
Iman joined the military and is now Commander for a battalion of 90 men. And while the capital is no longer a war zone, she continues to fight and lead security operations outside the city. Remarking on this success, she humbly explains:
“Being raised in Canada, I was taught you’re no different from any guy, you’re equal, you’re the same,” she says. “When I went into the military they said, ‘You can’t do that, it’s not your job.’ I wanted to break some of the stereotypes here.”
These two sisters are so beyond badass that someone better help me come up with a word that means more badass than badass.
It also seems that superhero powers run in the family. Before his tragic murder, their father was a well-known peace activist, cared for orphans and ran community programs. And their fabulous mother, Fartuun Adan, recently received an International Women of Courage Award from the U.S. Department of State for her humanitarian work.
They’re already saving the world, so the only thing I can say is that I’m keeping you ladies in my dua’as. Well done and keep up the good fight.
Random Stars rockin’ out.
2) No bad veil puns. No subtle allusions to women unchaining the shackles of oppression. Just five women from the United Arab Emirates rockin’ out to Deep Purple. The FIRST band of fantastically fierce Emirati women to belt out heavy metal chords on their electric guitars.
All thanks to Ms Small.
Brought together by their English teacher, these students from the Higher Colleges of Technology at Al Ain, had little to no experience with drums, bass or guitars — but now according to The National, they “perform at a variety of college events such as graduation ceremonies and National Day celebrations.”
Lead guitarist Hamda Al Ghaithi played piano and guitar for two years before hearing about the band:
“I met Ms Small and she told me about how the girls wanted to play and make a band. At first I didn’t like rock because I was studying classical guitar, but I prefer rock guitar now. I hope after I finish studying here that I will study music and play classical piano.”
Smoke on the water baby. Just wait until you all really get into Classic Rock. Ladies, you got to get yourselves on YouTube!
PressTV covered a recent protest by civil rights groups and families calling for the religious freedom of Muslim women and their civil liberty to pick up their children from school.
Mothers in headscarves are facing new discrimination at some schools who now object to seeing headscarves in the playground before and after school — claiming that the hijab’s “outward sign of religious practice go against the French law of religious neutrality in state-run institutions.”
*blank stare*
I don’t really need to get into how ridiculous this is, do I?
Try this: stand in-between a mother bear and her cub. Tell the mother bear that she can’t have her child until she looks more human. Pick up a pair of shears. Attempt to shave the bear and liberate her from her fur. Watch what happens.
4) Every little girl named Faiza just had her mind blown.
This is going viral right now just about everywhere, but if you haven’t heard the fantabulous news, Faiza Hussain, British Pakistani doctor by day, Excalibur by night has just been dubbed, Captain Britain.
A little backstory, Brian Baddock (the current Captain Britain) is teaming up with Captain Marvel (Avengers) on a kind of suicide mission against the evil Ultron (in “The Age of Ultron” storyline). Before leaving, he needs Faiza to keep MI-13 running. He needs “Captain Britain” to survive. For hope. For humanity.
A mainstream comic, Muslim, hijabi superhero people! What’s not to love?
This awe inspiring character wields the Arthurian sword Excalibur and can disassemble and reassemble people at the subatomic level. She’s also a healer by nature and a massive superhero fan girl – so you know she’ll keep to her roots.
Me rockin’ a turban twist inspired by babylailalov.
5) Finally, what DOES it mean to be a modern Muslim woman?
Well, according to the Daily Beast’s great piece on The Rise of Hijab Fashion Bloggers, the modern Muslim woman is “eclectic” and “creative” — bending the visuality of hijab with a blend of “vintage finds, lavish jewellery, Japanese-inspired silhouettes, high-end British sophistication and urban edge.”
The media may portray Muslim females as shrouded in black head-to-toe robes, feeding the stereotypical idea that modernism—not to mention fashion—and Islam cannot mix. But, as this crop of popular fashion blogs shows, wearing a hijab can mean a great number of things to a variety of women.
Well, yes. But point of information: Not all modern Muslim women wear hijab. And some modern Muslim women are shrouded in black head-to-toe robes. And they all have the potential to be eclectic, fashionable and creative.
Oh, but I do love watching hijab tutorials. Honestly, they’re awesome. From make-up to hijab pins — YouTube stars branching off into their own fashion lines and doing what inspires them. Kick-ass.
Well, after a whirlwind tour of South East England, we’re back in Canada. It’s definitely a bittersweet return home. While I’m glad this means more time to write, see friends and celebrate life with family — we really had a lovely time in Reading and met some truly wonderful people.
Plus, we saw the freakin’ Queen.
No really, you can just about see her hat. It was a very nice hat.
Be still my colonial heart. It was thrilling and I saw her smile for two seconds. It was warm and friendly and made her look better than she does on television.
I was actually a little surprised at how much excitement the pomp and circumstance generated, and how easily I got caught up in all the hoopla. It’s not like seeing the Queen was a life long dream — but everyone was just so happy to catch a glimpse of royalty, that it was easy to join in the fun.
So I acted appropriately and ran around with the babies, taking snaps with Police Constables, Marines and even the Town Crier. Kids make a great excuse to get nice and close to a fancy uniform.
I’m actually going to miss these birds and their rousing 3am moonlit trysts.
For Ivy’s birthday we went to Peppa Pig World and I think I had more fun than the kids — welling up the second we entered the park. There I was practically sobbing in the middle of screaming kids, pink piggy rides, and inane theme music. I think it was just the idea that my children were about to have mind blasting fun that set me off — somehow connecting to my own fun moments of childhood in one huge surge.
I was also pleasantly surprised to see the biggest assembly of Muslim families outside of Jummah — all coming together to enjoy a cartoon family of pigs.
Eryn watching closely and praying with one of her adopted Jummah “aunties.”
I will miss Fridays in Reading. Each one started with an hour of fun crafts and rhymes at the Museum of English Rural Life, and then Jummah at the Reading University Muslim Society. That’s where a seriously amazing group of women took care of my babies for over an hour every week. I can’t express how welcoming they were, how important it was for me to connect to other people — and to have Eryn and Ivy look forward to Friday prayers just to meet up with their “aunties.” It’s really a brilliant, little community.
Running to say “bye” to the ducks.
Over the last few days I’ve waxed nostalgic — experiencing the sights and sounds of Reading “for the last time,” collecting treasured memories of one of my new favourite cities. Walking the river Thames at night is simply amazing. Every library and museum has something amazing to offer to engage kids — and usually for free. Forbury Park is a treasure trove of green space and Palmer’s Park has the best playgrounds. Cornwall Pasties are delicious, but stay clear of the tomato-basil and cheese — it gave me a horrific (HORRIFIC) bout of food poisoning. Don’t miss out on the halal chicken at Rooster’s or the full halal menu at the Subway on Oxford Road. Skip the South Asian restaurant, Chennai Dosa, and instead go to the buffet Spice Oven for great halal Indian food.
Visiting Reading also gave me a unique opportunity to meet with a reader from South Africa and we spent a lovely afternoon talking like old friends, making grandiose plans to take on patriarchy, reclaim women’s spaces in the mosque, smash misogyny and take silly pictures of each other in the middle of a train station.
And in case you ever need to know, the BEST scones and tea can be found at The Rose tea room in Oxford.
It’s amazing how much you can get done in a day when you’re up 3 hours before the sun.
So now we’re home, slightly jet-lagged and missing the quaint 19th Century styled parks, cobble stone roads and red brick houses, romantic waterways, sleepy and colourful canal boats, and people saying “cheers” when I thank them for helping me with the girls.
I imagine things will be back to our “normal” shortly — even though Eryn now forces me to put on a fake British accent while role playing.
I love badass Muslimahs. Especially when they’re not setting out to be badass — but are badass by virtue of their good works and efforts.
Yeah okay, it also helps when fierce women hit bags, throw punches, spin kicks, run marathons and use their physical prowess to raise money for a local youth shelter.
A month ago a group of Muslim women started training to run a half-marathon taking place this Saturday in Ottawa. Their goal is to promote healthy and active lifestyles through the spirit of sport and raise money to help establish a youth centre to nurture the physical, emotional and spiritual needs of youth today.
Artists have an amazing culture of expression.
